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I’m looking forward to getting to Reno for Jim Munding’s show, managed to stop by on my way home from The Big Show this year. Another chance to pursue RFB from a couple of joints at the 21 tables. I also like the prevailing blackjack games I find in Reno, single deck pitch, just be aware that the rules can be all over the place. I like to pocket a chip or two and actually this is a favorite way to add chips to my collection…every chip brings a memory to mind when I run across it in my binders.

Seems to me that I made the remark here recently that I’d had the best 21 games when I found myself at a table with a drunken blonde woman. Usually seem to end up winning money in this situation but I always am able to acquire another good BJ story out of the deal no matter if I win or lose. Been drinking some India Pale Ale from my hometown tonight and got good music going so I thought I’d relate some of my recent table adventures, drunk blonde woman-wise. I’ve included some player images from Puzo’s Inside Las Vegas to assist in this endeavor. Thanks for any indulgence you may give this silly exercise. There’s “guy talk” ahead and remember that you should never confuse that with “mature subject matter”. I apologize in advance. Sorry.

Well, come on, let’s face it. Some folks seem to fare better in this world purely on physical attributes. Fact of life. I believe blond people are a favored sub-species as their visage is pleasant to gaze upon. People want to be with them, take them places and buy them things. Probably, as a result, their company is usually upbeat and mellow. I tend to notice blond women for these reasons and that whole man-woman chemistry thing that I’ve heard about. Women don’t have to be blond to make my blackjack game heaven on earth…there was that young brunette Beverly Hills lass at the Belagio and our discussion of lucky numbers several years ago, “Skinny” the red-head dealer at Siena who worked for Lincoln Fitzgerald and the graying lady that deals at Fitgerald’s who owns all those horses outside of Carson City (I bought my kid a Morgan and kid bought herself a quarter horse when she turned 12).

First buzzed blond lady this last trip was Monday morning when I went down to Atlantis to see why they were offering me free room nights as I didn’t really recall much about the joint except that I seem to have gotten a player’s card from them. I just cruise the BJ pits looking for a vacant seat, blotto blonds only register on my radar after I buy in. I looked up from my cards to find a tall 50ish gal at first base probably weighing in about a buck eighty-five. Blond and boozy. And trouble. I don’t know what her beef was but danger radiated off her like neon beaming out of the Circus Circus sign. She had me scared and the pretty boy dealing too. The pit critters were hiding under the porch and the cocktail dolls were detouring out around Omaha to avoid her. Probably widowed herself the night before and even with her size, she looked as if she could lioness-snatch you as deceased as her late hubby upstairs. Doubled my puny buy-in and beat it back to the casino district intact. Whew! More...

Sat down that evening of at Siena and noticed another big boned blonde down a couple of seats. Been drinking. Looks good for me, hit my 16 dealer! A cute young newlywed couple sat between us but they were in town on the Fourth during a Big Bowling Dealie and w/o reservations. Big blonde sez Give ‘em My Room! Turns out she’s a local but the three or four thousand in black she’s got stacked behind all the greenies earns her a lot of attention from the pit bosses…and a room for the kids. Neat. I like this lady a lot. Made some money and got another table story.

Next day met tipsy blond #3 over at Silver Legacy. She was first base and I acted next. Early thirties, athletic and a very nice earth-mother sensuality thing going on. She had Coronas coming and going at a brisk rate. She was also one of the LOUDEST people I’ve ever run across! Her conversational tone was a lot like the Jake on my Detroit 60-series when I’m coming down from Emigrant Springs looking for a cup of midnight coffee at The Arrowhead. When this nice lady hit a blackjack the decibel level went up to oh, around .45 ACP in a closed car or thereabouts. (Don’t ask…okay?) There was another set of attributes that endeared her to me and earned her the enmity of the lady dealers that rotated through our table that afternoon. And I do mean "set". Getting the picture? Well, she would win on a natural twenty-one and the arms would shoot up and she’d be bouncing in her seat and well, her uh, set of attributes would start…well, they’d start too, kinda on their own seeking many different points on the compass. I work in an environment where employment can be curtailed if you’ve a tendency to stare at females. Happily, I do have excellent peripheral vision. So I enjoyed her company and good luck celebrations, piled up some of my own chip stacks and bid her good luck when she departed. Everyone’s ears were ringing and the gals with the cards in their hands were glad she was gone being all loud and well "set" and FUN!

That night I home in on a vacant third base over at Eldorado and get my hundie on the felt. Wow…I smell beerbeerbeer. Get my chips, look up and Wow!, THREE blondes with beerbeerbeer! The one closest to me is a moonfaced husband lookin’ guy so he passes into blessed invisibility thanks to all those free gin and tonics I’d been downing and also because of the remaining two blond creatures he was with. Oh man. Midtwenties and blonde and green-eyed. Oh man. Sisters. Oh man. The “plain” looking one was Hooters, Hawaiian Tropic type of plain while Sis was… Oh man... authentic pose with Trimble at the Palms Playmate material. Oh man Oh man Oh man. Truth is I don’t usually end up this close to such female beauty. There’s usually like, velvet ropes and big off-duty cops between me and ladies like these two. Dang, I know I sure wanted to buy them something. Or take them someplace.

Beautiful beery blondes – a blackjack game for the ages! Actually these ladies were sophisticated in their self aware acknowledgement of the stunning effect they had on the rotation of the earth and that was fun to watch. Apparently a grinning old coot at third base amused them as I became known to them and the satellites spinning in their thrall as “Friend”. “Look,” one would say to the other, “Friend got a Blackjack!” and then they’d smile at me and I’d forget my real name anyway. Oh BTW, these two were sisters of the Earth Mother from earlier in the day in that their celebrations were similar demos of hands clapping over their heads, chair bouncing and visions that evoked thoughts of countless episodes of Charlie’s Angels and the whole Jiggle Decade thing back when. More...

Did I win any money that night at the Eldo? Shoot, don’t recall honestly but I’ll never forget how much fun it was. Seems to me that over the years I did get rich at the tables in a different way. Made folks from other lands feel comfy hereabouts, talked restaurants and traffic patterns with people from Chicago, Atlanta, Duluth and Moose Jaw. Helped that lady who was scared for her nephew in that nasty place north of Baghdad. Talked Packards with that guy at the Crystal Bay Club and listened to cowboy talk here and there along the way. And I played in a place where the money would blow off the table when someone opened the front door. Yep, guess I did get rich.