IM A BIT EMBARRASSED FOR HOW DRUNK I GOT THAT NIGHT/MORNING. IT WAS A LONG NIGHT FROM THE AMOUNT I CAN RECALL. IT STARTED OFF WITH MY SON AND I GETTING AN EARLY DINNER AT THE SOUTH POINT STEAK AND SHAKE-ONE OF OUR FAVORITES. NEXT, I MEET CHIPPER CHUCK AT THE BARTOP VIDEO POKER MACHINE AND THE NIGHT WENT DOWN FROM THERE. EVERYONE KNOWS YOU CAN’T KEEP UP WITH THAT POLISH BOOZE MACHINE. 🥃🥃🥃🥃🎰🎰🎰🎰🫣🫣🫣🫣.
THAT LONG PRE CONVENTION LAS VEGAS NIGHT, I WAS PICKING UP OUR BUDDY JAMES CAMPIGLIA UP FROM HIS LATE ARRIVAL EAST COAST FLIGHT. I ALREADY KNEW MY SON WAS DRIVING SINCE I WON’T DRIVE WITH MORE THAN ONE DRINK IN MY SYSTEM. ANYWAY, I WAS ALREADY PASSED SLOSHED WHEN I MET HAYDEN AT THE BARTOP VIDEO POKER AND HEADED TO THE SOUTH POINT PARKING GARAGE. LAST YEAR, WE DROVE TO LV FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 8 YEARS. I ALWAYS PREFER TO JUST FLY THE SHORT ONE HOUR FLIGHT. ONCE WE FOUND MY 4RUNNER, BEFORE I GOT INTO THE PASSENGER SEAT, HAYDEN TOLD ME I URINATED IN THE SP PARKING GARAGE NEXT TO THE CAR PRIOR TO GETTING IN 🤦‍♂️😬🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️. HE ALSO ADVISED ME THAT THE DIRECTIONS I WAS GIVING HIM TO THE LAS VEGAS AIRPORT WERE ALL SCREWED UP 🫣AND HE HAD TO MAKE SEVERAL U TURNS 🫣🤔🤦‍♂️. WHEN WE FINALLY ARRIVED TO THE AIRPORT AND PARKED IN THE UPPER PARKING LOT, I CALLED JAMES AND TOLD HIM WHERE WE WERE PARKED. WHILE WAITING FOR JAMES TO WALK OUT, I URINATED AGAIN IN THE AIRPORT PARKING LOT. ALTHOUGH, I’M SURE I WAS NOT THE FIRST. 🫣😬😬🫢🤦‍♂️. I ACTUALLY REMEMBERED THAT SECOND ONE 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻🤔🤔. SORRY JAMES, I’M SURE I NEVER WASHED MY HANDS AFTER BOTH OF THOSE. 😲😲😲😲😉😉.

ONCE WE GOT JAMES AND ARRIVED BACK AT THE SOUTH POINT, HAYDEN WENT UPTO THE ROOM TO PLAY ONLINE GAMES WITH HIS FRIENDS, JAMES WENT TO CHECK IN BEFORE HEADING UPTO HIS ROOM AND STUPID ME SAT BACK DOWN AT THE VIDEO POKER AND CONTINUED TO DRINK MY SHOTS OF MANDARIN VODKA. I GOTTA SAY, THOSE RUSKIES CAN HANDLE THEIR DRINKS IF THEY CAN POUND THAT ROCKET FUEL. AFTER A HANDFUL OF SHOTS, THIS IS WHERE THE NIGHT GET’S A BIT HAZY. ALL I KNOW IS THAT I LOST WAY TOO MUCH MONEY, DRANK WAY TOO MUCH, CUSSED A TON, MADE A BUNCH OF PLAYERS CLUB POINTS, AND THE NEXT THING I KNOW @5:30AM, A SP SECURITY GUARD WAS BEHIND ME TELLING ME HE HAD A WHEELCHAIR ON THE WAY TO BRING ME BACK TO MY ROOM. I DO REMEMBER TELLING HIM “I’M FINE” BUT WE BOTH KNEW THAT WAS CLEARLY ALL BS. ALL DRUNKS AND DRUNK DRIVERS ALWAYS SAY THAT SAME EXACT THING AFTER BEING PULLED OVER 😒😒😒.
WHEN THE WHEELCHAIR ARRIVED, I REMEMBER SITTING DOWN IN THE CHAIR AND LOVING THE COOL AIR IN MY DRUNKEN FACE WHILE THE GUY WAS PUSHING ME BACK UPTO THE 25TH FLOOR. THE GUARDS ALREADY HAD MY NAME AND ROOM INFORMATION FROM MY PLAYERS CARD SO I DIDN’T HAVE TO REMEMBER MY ROOM #. I ALWAYS TAKE A PICTURE OF MY ROOM NUMBER WHEN IN LAS VEGAS JUST FOR THIS VERY REASON. THE GUARDS ALSO GOT MY TITO OUT OF THE MACHINE AND GAVE IT TO ME. ONCE IN THE ROOM, I THANKED THE GUARDS FOR THEIR HELP AND EVENTUALLY FELL INTO BED.

THE NEXT DAY IS WHERE IT GET’S REALLY BAD. I COULD NOT GET OUTTA BED EXCEPT FOR GOING TO THE BATHROOM. I THOUGHT I WAS DYING. I SENT HAYDEN DOWN TO THE GIFTSHOP TO PICK ME A FEW GATORADES BUT COULD NOT EAT. HE KEPT ASKING ME DAD, WHY DID YOU DRINK SO MUCH?? I TOLD HIM I DIDN’T KNOW AND IT WOULD BE A LONG TIME BEFORE I EVER DRINK AGAIN. HE MADE THE BEST OF IT AND ORDERED ROOM SERVICE A COUPLE OF TIMES THAT DAY SO HE WAS HAPPY. I DIDN’T GET UP AND SHOWERED TILL THE NEXT MORNING ABOUT 7:00AM. I’M THINKING CHIPPER CHUCK MIGHT HAVE SLIPPED ME A ROOFIE IN MY VODKA??!
ANYWAY, I’M SORRY FOR NOT HELPING DURING PRE SET-UP EVERYONE AND PROMISE,TO HOPEFULLY 😏🥺 NOT TO DRINK SO MUCH THIS JUNE. I CLEARLY CAN’T HANDLE TOO MUCH VODKA. THAT STUFF HITS ME LIKE A BRICK.

THANKS AGAIN FOR THE SPLASHY AWARD, I HOPE I CAN LIVE UPTO IT 🥃🥃🥃🥃🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️😒😒😒🥃🥃🥃🥃🎰🎰🎰🎰 I WISH I COULD HAVE BEEN THERE AT THE ORIGINAL RIVIERA SPLASHY BAR WITH ALL OF YOU GUYS BACK IN THE DAY. I BET IT WAS A CRAZY TIME WITH THIS WILD GROUP.

THOSE SOUTH POINT SECURITY GUARDS, BARTENDERS AND ALL HOTEL STAFF ARE AND HAVE ALWAYS BEEN TOP NOTCH AMD GO THAT EXTRA MILE TO MAKE SURE THEIR DRUNKEN MORONS ARE SAFELY BACK INTO THEIR ROOMS. YOU WILL NOT SEE THIS FROM ALL LAS VEGAS HOTELS.

THANKS SOUTH POINT. HAVE SOME VODKA READY FOR US THIS JUNE.