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The perspicacious Dragnet, who lives a bit southwest, sent this oldie...

How to get to Heaven from Ireland
- A true story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher -

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they
understood the concept of getting to heaven.

I asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale
and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?"

"NO!" the children answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept
everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?"

Again, the answer was "NO!"

By now I was starting to smile. "Well, then, if I was kind to animals
and gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that
get me into heaven?"

Again, they all answered "NO!"

I was just bursting with pride for them.

I continued, "Then how can I get into heaven?"

A six year-old boy shouted out: "YUV GOTTA BE FOOKN' DEAD..."

'Tis a curious race, the Irish.
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