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Both Huck Finn of Midwest fame and Keystone from the West Coast sent this one
on dealing with someone who is inebriated...

WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER QUESTION A DRUNK...

I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected the following:

one half-gallon of 2% milk
one carton of eggs
one quart of orange juice
one head of lettuce
one 2 lb. can of coffee
one 1 lb. package of bacon

As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing
behind me watched as I placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated: "You must
be single."

I was a bit startled by this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the derelict's intuition,
since I indeed had never found Mr. Right. I looked at the six items on the belt and saw
nothing particularly unusual about my selections that could have tipped off the drunk
to my marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: "Yes. You are correct. But how on earth did
you know that?"

The drunk replied: "Cuz you're ugly."
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