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Ebad, the somewhat shy but always irrepressible gentleman from the
midwest, sent this one...

A blonde hurried into the emergency room late one night with the tip of
her index finger shot off.

"How did this happen?" asked the emergency room doctor.

"Well, I was trying to commit suicide," the blonde replied.

"What?" sputtered the doctor. "You tried to commit suicide by shooting
off your finger?"

"No, silly," the blonde said. "First I put the gun to my chest, and then I
thought to myself: I just paid $6,000 for these implants... I am not
shooting myself in the chest."

"So then?" asked the doctor.

"Then I put the gun in my mouth, and I thought to myself: Not that
long ago I paid $3,000 to get my teeth straightened... No way am I
shooting myself in the mouth."

"So then?"

"Then I put the gun to my ear, and I thought to myself: This is going
to make a very loud noise. So I put my finger in my other ear before
I pulled the trigger."