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Dragnet, a somewhat perspicacious gentleman who lives a bit southwest, sent
this one on the subject of a guy named Brian...

A man walked out to the street and caught a taxi just going by.

He got into the taxi, and the cabbie said, "Perfect timing. You're just like Brian."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Brian. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming
along when you needed a cab, things happen like that to Brian, every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Brian . He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam
at tennis. He could golf with Tiger Wood. He sang like an opera baritone and he
danced like Gene Kelly and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an
amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which
fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and
the whole street blacks out. But Brian, he could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow. Some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic
jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Brian, he never
made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her
feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong;
and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was
the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up
to Brian."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Brian... He died and I have the misfortune
to be married to his damned widow."
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