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The somewhat shy and retiring Abie, who lives a bit southwest,
sent this one...

Paddy passed away suddenly. His will provided £40,000 for an
elaborate funeral.

As the last guests departed the affair, his wife Colleen turned to
her oldest and dearest friend.

"Ah well, to be sure Paddy would be pleased," she said.

"To be sure you're right," replied Mary, who lowered her voice and
leaned in close. "So go on, how much did this really cost?'"

"All of it," said Colleen. "Forty thousand."

"Aw No!" Mary exclaimed. "I mean, it was very grand, but £40,000?"

Colleen answered, "The funeral was £6,500. I donated £500 to the
church. The whiskey, wine and snacks were another £500. The rest
went for the Memorial Stone."

Mary computed quickly. "For the love of God, Colleen, £32,500 for a
Memorial Stone? How big is it?"

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(The Memorial Stone)

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