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Abie, a somewhat shy and retiring gentleman who lives a bit southwest,
sent this one on the subject of remarriage...
A woman who had been married three times walked into a bridal shop one
day and told the sales clerk that she was looking for a wedding gown for
her fourth wedding.
"Of course, madam," replied the sales clerk, "exactly what type and color
dress are you looking for?"
The bride to be said, "A long frilly white dress with a veil."
The sales clerk hesitated a bit, then said, "Please don't take this the wrong
way, but gowns of that nature are considered more appropriate for brides
who are being married the first time - for those who are a bit more innocent,
if you know what I mean? Perhaps ivory or sky blue would be nice?"
"Well," replied the customer, a little peeved at the clerk's directness, "I can
assure you that a white gown would be quite appropriate. Believe it or not,
despite all my marriages, I remain as innocent as a first-time bride. You see,
my first husband was so excited about our wedding, he died just as we were
checking into our honeymoon hotel. My second husband and I got into such
a terrible fight in the limo on our way to our honeymoon hotel that we had
that wedding annulled immediately and never spoke to each other again."
"What about your third husband?" asked the sales clerk.
"That one was a Democrat," said the woman, "and every night for four years,
he just sat on the edge of the bed and told me how good it was going to be,
but nothing ever happened."
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