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The Chip Board Archive 23

grin NCR ~ Wednesday Humor, December 10th (Mature)

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Huck Finn, a truly perceptive gentleman from the upper midwest, sent this
collection of what he considers humor in the Rodney Dangerfield tradition...

Rodney Dangerfield Kinda Humor

I got invited to a party and was told to dress to kill. Apparently a turban,
beard and a backpack wasn't what they had in mind.

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After a night of drink, drugs and wild sex, Jim woke up to find himself next
to a really ugly woman. That's when he realized he had made it home safely.

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Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they
tested positive for WD40.

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A boy asks his granny, "Have you seen my pills, they were labeled LSD?"
Granny replies, "Screw the pills, have you seen the dragons in the kitchen?"

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Wife gets naked and asks hubby, "What turns you on more, my pretty face
or my sexy body?"
Hubby looks her up and down and replies, "Your sense of humor!"

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My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I
should have taken them off.

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The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with.
I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!"

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My missus packed my bags, and as I walked out the front door, she screamed,
"I wish you a slow and painful death, you basterd!"
"Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!"

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A government survey has shown that 91% of illegal immigrants come to this
country so that they can see their own doctor.

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A friend of mine just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. He said it makes
his wife look like she's moving during sex.

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Copyright 2022 David Spragg