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Both Abie from the East Coast and Huck Finn from the Midwest sent
this one...

The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would
someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their
dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This
"duel" would be a dog fight.

The negotiators agreed each side would take 5 years to develop the best
fighting dog they could. The dog that won the fight would earn its people
the right to rule the disputed areas. The losing side would then have to lay
down its arms for good.

The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the
world. They bred them together and then crossed their offspring with the
meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy
of each litter, fed it the best food and killed all the other puppies. They used
steroids and trainers in their quest for the perfect killing machine. After the
5 years were up, they had a dog that needed steel prison bars on its cage.
Only expert trainers could handle this incredibly nasty and ferocious beast.

When the day of the big dog-fight finally arrived, the Israelis showed up
with a very strange-looking animal, a Dachshund that was 10 feet long!
Everyone at the dogfight arena felt sorry for the Israelis. No one there
seriously thought this weird, odd-looking animal stood any chance against
the growling beast over in the Arab camp. All the bookies took one look
and predicted that the Arab dog would win in less than a minute.

As the cages were opened, the Dachshund slowly waddled toward the
center of the ring. The Arab dog leaped from its cage and charged the
giant wiener-dog. As he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the
Dachshund opened its jaws and swallowed the Arab beast whole in one
bite.

There was nothing left but a small puff of fur from the Arab killer dog’s
tail floating to the ground.

The stunned crowd of international observers, bookies, and the media
personnel let out a collective gasp of disbelief and surprise.

The Arabs approached the Israelis, muttering and shaking their heads
in disbelief. "We do not understand," said their leader, "Our top scientists
and breeders worked for 5 long years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans,
Rottweilers and Siberian wolves, and they developed an incredible killing
machine of a dog!"

The Israelis replied. "Well, for 5 years, we have had a team of Jewish plastic
surgeons from Boca Raton working to make an alligator look like a Dachshund."
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