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El Lobo Reservado, a sagacious gentleman from out west, sent this one on the subject
of marital perfection.
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A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.

He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank."

Passenger: "Who?"

Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my
coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman
every single time."

Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."

Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand
Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and he
danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was
an amazing guy."

Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."

Cabbie: "There's more. He had a memory like a computer. He always remembered
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork
to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole
street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right."

Passenger: "Wow, some guy then."

Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not
like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and
he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer
her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes
highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could
ever, ever measure up to Frank Feldman."

Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"

Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank, he died and I married his freakin' wife."
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