.
.

Oxymorons

An oxymoron is figure of speech in which apparently contradictory terms appear
in conjunction.

~ Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

~ Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

~ If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

~ If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

~ Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

~ Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

~ Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

~ Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

~ Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

~ Why are they called "stands" when they are made for sitting?

~ Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

~ Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

~ Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

~ Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

~ Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

~ If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

~ If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

~ If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

~ If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

~ Why is bra singular and bloomers or pant-eez plural?

~ Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know
the batteries are dead?

~ Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

~ How come abbreviated is such a long word?

~ Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

~ Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

~ Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

~ Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and
eat candy out of your socks?

~ Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

~ Why is toilet paper tiny squares and tissues big squares?
.

.