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Defense Attorney: Will you please state your age?

Little Old Lady: I am 76 years old.

Defense Attorney: Will you tell us, in your own words, what happened
on the night of April 1st?

Little Old Lady: There I was, sitting there in my swing on my front porch
on a warm spring evening, when a young man comes creeping up on the
porch and sat down beside me.

Defense Attorney: Did you know him?

Little Old Lady: No, but he sure was friendly. He started to rub my thigh.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him?

Little Old Lady: No, I didn't stop him.

Defense Attorney: Why not?

Little Old Lady: It felt good. Nobody had done that since my Albert died
some 20 years ago.

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Lady: He began to touch my breasts.

Defense Attorney: Did you stop him then?

Little Old Lady: No, I certainly did not!

Defense Attorney: Why ever not?

Little Old Lady: His touching made me feel all alive and excited. I haven't
felt that good in years!

Defense Attorney: What happened next?

Little Old Lady: Well, I was feeling so spicy that I just laid down and told
him: Take me, young man. Take me now!

Defense Attorney: Did he take you?

Little Old Lady: Hell, no! He just yelled, April Fool and that's when I shot
the little b@stard.
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