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Dragnet, a very discerning gentleman who lives southwest, sent this one...

Last week, she checked into a motel on her 70th birthday and she was a bit
lonely.

She thought, to herself: "I'll call one of those men you see advertised in the
phone books for escorts and sensual massages."

Looking through the phone book, she found a full page ad for a guy calling
himself Tender Tony - a very handsome man with assorted physical skills
flexing in the photo.

He had all the right muscles in all the right places, thick wavy hair, muscled
arms, long powerful legs, dazzling smile and six pack abs. She felt quite
certain she could bounce a silver dollar off his well oiled posterior...

She figured, What the heck, nobody will ever know. I'll give him a call.

"Good evening, ma'am, how may I help you?" (Oh my, he sounded sooo sexy!)

Afraid she would lose her nerve if she hesitated, she rushed right in, "Hi, I
hear you give a great massage. I'd like you to come to my motel room and
give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone
and what I really want is sex. I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring it all:
toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks.
We'll go hot and heavy all night - tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup
and whipped cream, anything and everything, I'm ready! Now, how does
that sound?"

He said, "That sounds absolutely fantastic, but you need to press 9 for an
outside line."

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