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Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just
stale bread to begin with?

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If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people
who are from Holland called Holes?

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If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

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Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a
person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

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If it's true that we are here to help others,t then what exactly
are the others here for?

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If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't
it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,
cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked,
and dry cleaners depressed?

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If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it FedUP??

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Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'

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What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of all the
bald men?

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I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use?
Toothpicks?
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Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write to them? Why don't they
just put their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen
can look for them while they deliver the mail?

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Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn
to drive?

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If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?

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Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?