Hi Ralph.

1. The iPad does not have a phone.
2. No - no phone.
3. You can download scans in a couple of ways. If/when you get an iPad, you would also download iTunes (free). You can then sink your pictures to the iPad through that program. Another way: I converted my boxing chip catalog into a .pdf format and use iBooks (also free) to put the entire catalog on my iPad.
4. No - you can't hook up an external drive to the iPad.
5. No. However, the recently introduced the iPad 2, so you may be able to find some used iPads on .
6. I don't have one available.

You may want to consider a netbook as opposed to an iPad. Not as flashy as an iPad, but you can hook up an external DVD drive to one.