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Beef, a witty gentleman with an electrifying personality, sent this one about
Israeli and Arabic dogs...

The Israeli Dog vs. The Arab Dog

The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would
someday end up destroying the whole world. So they decided to settle their
dispute with an ancient practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This
duel would be a dog fight.

The negotiators agreed each side would take five years to develop the best
fighting dog they could. The dog that won the fight would earn its people
the right to rule the disputed areas. The losing side would have to lay down
its arms for good.

The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the world.
They bred them together and then crossed their offspring with the meanest
Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy of each litter,
fed it the best food and killed all the other pups. They used steroids and trainers
in their quest for the perfect killing machine. After the five years were up, they
had a dog that needed steel prison bars on its cage. Only expert trainers could
handle this incredibly nasty and ferocious beast.

When the day of the big dog-fight finally arrived, the Israelis showed up with a
very strange-looking animal, a Dachshund that was ten feet long!

Everyone at the dogfight arena felt sorry for the Israelis. No one there seriously
thought this weird, odd-looking animal stood any chance against the growling
beast over in the Arab camp. All the bookies took one look and predicted that
the Arab dog would win in less than a minute.

As the cages were opened, the Dachshund slowly waddled toward the center of
the ring.

The Arab dog leaped from its cage and charged the giant wiener-dog.

As he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its jaws and
swallowed the Arab beast whole in one bite.

There was nothing left but a small puff of fur from the Arab killer dog's tail floating
to the ground.

The stunned crowd of international observers, bookies and media personnel let out
a collective gasp of disbelief and surprise.

The Arabs approached the Israelis, muttering and shaking their heads in disbelief.

"We do not understand," said their leader, "Our top scientists and breeders worked
for five long years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans, Rottweilers and Siberian
wolves. They developed an incredible killing machine of a dog!"

The Israelis replied: "Well, for five years, we have had a team of prominent Jewish
plastic surgeons from Boca Raton, Florida working to make an alligator look like a
Dachshund."
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