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[i]Abie, a rather shy and retiring gentleman who lives southwest, sent this one about
a burglar and Jesus...

A burglar broke into a house one night.

He shined his flashlight around, looking for valuables when a voice in the dark said,
"Jesus knows you're here."

He nearly jumped out of his skin and clicked his flashlight. When he heard nothing
more, after a bit, he shook his head and continued.

Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, clear as a bell.
he heard: "Jesus is watching you."

Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice.
Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot.

"Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot.

"Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you that Jesus
is watching you."

The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?"

"Moses," replied the bird.

"Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?"

"The kind of people that would name a Rottweiler Jesus."

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