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Abie, a somewhat shy and retiring gentleman who lives southwest, sent this one
about Jewish mothers...

What might have been said, if certain famous people had Jewish mothers...

Mona Lisa
"After all the money your father and I spent on braces, this you call a smile?"

Christopher Columbus
"I don't care what you've discovered, you didn't call, you didn't write..."

Michelangelo
"A ceiling you paint? Not good enough for you the walls, like the other children?
Do you know how hard it is to get that schmutz off the ceiling?'

Napoleon
"You're not hiding your report card? Show me! Take your hand out of your jacket
and show me!"

Abraham Lincoln
"Again with that hat! Why can't you wear a baseball cap like the other kids?'

George Washington
"Next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can just kiss your
allowance good-bye!"

Thomas Edison
"Okay, so I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now turn it off already
and go to sleep!"

Paul Revere
"I don't care where you think you have to go, young man, midnight is long past your
bedtime!"

Albert Einstein
"Your senior photograph and you couldn't have done something with your hair?"

Moses
"Desert, schmesert!! Where have you really been for the last forty years?"

Bill Gates
"It would have killed you to become a doctor?"

Bill Clinton
"Well, at least she was a nice Jewish girl."
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