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Today is the oldest you've ever been, yet the youngest you'll ever be
-- So enjoy this day while it lasts ...

Observations on Growing Older

~~ Your kids are becoming you... and you don't like them... but your
grandchildren are perfect!

~~ Going out is good... Coming home is better!

~~ When people say you look Great... they add, For your age!

~~When you needed the discount, you paid full price. But now you get
discounts on everything... movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to
use them.

~~You forget names... but it's OK because other people forgot they even
knew you!

~~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a much better
chance of losing your keys than the 15 pounds.

~~You realize you're never going to be really good at anything.... especially
the game of golf.

~~Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.

~~The things you used to care to do, you no longer care to do, but you really
do care that you don't care to do them anymore.

~~Your spouse sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he or
she does in bed. It's called their pre-sleep.

~~Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you get
in an accident"? Now you bring clean underwear in case you have an accident!

~~You used to say, "I hope my kids get married... Now, "I hope they stay married!"

~~You miss the days when everything worked with just an ON and OFF switch.

~~When GOOGLE, ipod, email and modem.... were unheard of, and a mouse was
something that made you climb onto a table.

~~You tend to use more 4 letter words ... what?...when?...

~~Now that you can afford expensive jewelry, it's not safe to wear it anywhere.

~~Your husband/wife has a night out with the guys or gals but is home by 9:00 PM.
Next week it will be 8:30 P.M.

~~You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.

~~Notice everything they sell in stores is sleeveless?

~~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

~~Everybody whispers.

~~Now that your spouse has retired... you'd give anything if he/she would find a job!

~~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet... 2 of which you will never wear.

~~But old is good in some things: old songs, old movies, And best of all, Old Friends!