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I couldn't decide which of these golf tales to post...

A husband and wife are on the 9th green when suddenly she collapses from
a heart attack!

"Help me dear," she groans to her husband.

The husband calls 911 on his cell phone, talks for a few minutes, picks up his
putter and lines up his putt. His wife raises her head off the green and stares
at him.

"I'm dying here and you're putting?"

"Don't worry, my dear," says the husband calmly, "they found a doctor on the
second hole and he's coming to help you.

"Well, how long will it take for him to get here?" she asks feebly.

"Actually, no time at all," says her husband. "Everybody's already agreed to
let him play through."

Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody 5-iron
standing over a lifeless man.

The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?"

"Yes" says the woman. "Did you hit him with that golf club?"

"Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her
hands on her face.

"How many times did you hit him?"

"I don't know. Five, six, maybe seven times... Just put me down for a five."
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