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Huck Finn, a truly perceptive gentleman from the midwest, sent this one...

Out of the mouths of babes

Nudity
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible
ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my
5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

Opinions
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read,
"The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

Ketchup
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang,
so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone.
"Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

More Nudity
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the ladies' locker room. When he was spotted,
the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.
The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a
little boy before?"

Police
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my
equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me.
"Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked.
"It sure is," I replied.
Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van.
Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

The Elderly
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my
4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances
of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of
false teeth soaking in a glass.
As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "
The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

Dress-Up
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party.
When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."

Death
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that
nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin.
Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then
dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and, with sonorous dignity, intoned his
version of what he thought his father always said:
"Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he goes."
(I want this line used at my funeral.)

School
A little girl had just finished her first week of school.
"I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!"

The Bible
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly,
something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had
been pressed in between the pages.
"Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?"
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!
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