From the files of Ebad, the somewhat shy but always irrepressible gentleman from the midwest..

Love Making Tips For Seniors

1. Wear your glasses… to make sure your partner is actually in the bed.

2. Set timer for 3 minutes… in case you doze off in the middle.

3. Set the mood with lighting… (Turn them ALL OFF!)

4. Make sure you put 911 on your speed dial before you begin.

5. Write partner's name on your hand… in case you can't remember.

6. Use extra polygrip so your teeth don't end up under the bed.

7. Have Tylenol ready… in case you actually complete the act.

8. Make all the noise you want... The neighbors are deaf too.

9. If it works, call everyone you know with the good news!!

10. Don't even think about trying it twice.

OLD IS WHEN...

Your sweetie says, Let's go upstairs And make love, and you answer, Pick one; I can't do both!

Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes… and you're barefoot.

Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police .

Getting a little action means you don't need to take any fiber today.

Getting luckymeans you find your car in the parking lot.

An all nighter means not getting up to use the bathroom.

And, lastly:

OLD IS WHEN... You are not sure if these are facts or jokes!
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