PM: Do female frogs croak?
Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
PM: If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
PM: True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
PM: You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
PM: According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
PM: Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
PM: In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say I Love You?
Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
PM: What are Do It, I Can Help, and I Can't Get Enough?
George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
PM: As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
PM: Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
PM: Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
PM: In bowling, what's a perfect score?
Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
PM: It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps One is politics, what is the other?
Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
PM: During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
PM: Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
PM: When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
PM: If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
PM: According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
PM: It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
PM: Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
PM: Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
PM: When a couple has a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
PM: Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
Charley Weaver: His feet.
PM: According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
Paul Lynde: Point and laugh
WE DON'T STOP LAUGHING BECAUSE WE GROW OLD, WE GROW OLD BECAUSE WE STOP LAUGHING!
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