Dear Boss:

I have enjoyed working here these past years. You have paid me very well, given me benefits beyond belief, supplied my transportation to every place imaginable. I have 3-4 months off per year and a pension plan that will pay my generous salary and supply health care and medicine for my entire family for my life. After my death, my wife will continue to draw that salary.

Regardless, I plan to take the next 12-18 months to find a new position. During this time, I will show up for work when it is convenient. I fully expect to draw my full salary and all the other perks associated with my current job.

Also, I forgot to mention that, if my search for this new job proves fruitless, I will be back with no loss in pay or status. Before you say anything, remember that you have no choice in the matter. I can and will do these things.

Sincerely,
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Every Senator and Congressman running for President or for office.