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Abie, a rather shy, retiring gentleman who lives southeast, sent this one...

Shorty, a dwarf from Texas, was in constant pain. He went to visit the doctor and told him that his testicles hurt and ached almost all of the time. The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would have a look.

He stood Shorty up onto the examining table, and started to examine him. The doctor put one finger under Shorty's left testicle and told him to turn his head and cough, the usual method to check for a hernia.

"Aha!" mumbled the doctor, and as he put his finger under the right testicle, he asked Shorty to cough again. "Aha!" said the doctor once more.

He turned around, reached for his surgical scissors.

Snip-snip-snip-snip, Shorty heard on the right side... then snip-snip-snip-snip on the left side.

Shorty was so scared he was afraid to look, but noted with amazement that the snipping did not hurt.

The doctor told Shorty to walk around the examining room to see if his testicles still hurt. The dwarf was absolutely delighted as he walked around and discovered his boys were no longer aching.

The doctor said, "How does that feel now?"

Shorty replied, "Perfect Doc, and I didn't even feel it. What did you do?"

The doctor replied "I cut two inches off the top of your cowboy boots."