I'd say, keep trying.

I don't know how you could contact eBay about breaking the rules and avioding their sales commissions?

The sale that you did pay for was shipped.

I'd feel bad if someone cheated me, but since the sale was not eBay and against the eBay guidelines, you might just keep trying to resolve it with the person who was supposed to ship it.

Yes, keep us posted and if the person refuses to make good, a note here is always interesting.