Couldn't tell if it was sarcasm or not...but...
DO NOT NUKE IT!
Will yellow the PVC, probably warp it more, and your microwave may not enjoy the ferrite particles in the mag stripe!
The other suggestions may work in "unwarping" the card, but you will probably damage the gloss surface of the card. Unless a particularly rare card, use as filler only and replace ASAP!
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