If you have some spare time during a lull at the Blast from the Past show, find a K-Mart & try out some of the following fun activities:
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them & standing them at stategic locations.
2. Set all alarm clocks to go off at 10 minute intervals throughout the day.
3. While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible, "I smell sex & candy."
4. Go up to an employee & tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in housewares," & see what happens.
5. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
6. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off & turn the volumes to "10".
7. Put M&M's on layaway.
8. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry & ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?!"
9. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible".
11. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
12. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
13. Hide in the clothing racks & when people browse through, say things like "pick me!! pick me!!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position & scream "NO, NO! It's those voices again!"
15. Go into the dressing room & yell real loud, "Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
I checked all the local laws in Biloxi & can't find any reference to the above behaviors. You can't get arrested, trust me. Before I arrive on Friday, I will have checked with the mental health agencies to see if the store manager has the power to have you locked up. I doubt it.